Spiritual Practice

There is a mountain of unfinished resolutions behind me. Luckily, I’ve let that disappointment go and simply accepted that they just can’t all get done. Some were too big. Others, too boring. Others, well…everyone is lazy sometimes.

Maybe, there just wasn’t enough momentum behind the resolution. Not enough caring. Not enough personal desire to change. Adopting a new discipline is hard. It can be worth the effort (Look at the pounds go! Look at my business flourish!). But without real passion behind your resolutions and dreams, it seems astronomically unlikely that they will ever happen.

This year, ask yourself: How do you want to feel? What if instead of accomplishing something specific, you focused every day on feeling more joyful? More ecstatic? More spiritual? More grounded? With that kind of resolution, your day-to-day activities can change dramatically. You won’t be derailed by the unexpected intrusions of life, you simply refocus and incorporate it all into your plan for happiness. Every day, remember, life is really about being happy. And every day, try again to take yourself closer to your joy.

I have always had a difficulty with forced gratitude. That Thanksgiving tradition, when everyone expresses something that they are grateful for, was always hard for me. I felt like such things should flow from the moment, spontaneous outpourings of emotion. And yet, when I really allow myself to feel and express my appreciation, in spite of being asked, I feel it deeply - as if the cells in my chest swell up with joy and sing.

The thing is, gratitude has the power to change your perspective instantly. Imagine, in the middle of a bad day, you start thinking of all the people and things that you love in your life. Not only thinking it, but feeling through your body and your being. In my experience, it makes everything seem softer and much easier to deal with. I often get other great ideas in that moment to change things even further.  

Here’s an example: I remember a time, in my late teens, when my dad had just reprimanded me and all my siblings – then had gone up to his room. We (the kids) sat stewing, angry about the injustice of it all, cursing parents and everything they didn’t understand – would NEVER understand. And in the back of my mind, I knew that my dad was having a really bad day. Maybe even a bad week. And this sneaky little thought came to mind – He really is a great dad.

Humph. I thought in return. I was enjoying the anger. I didn’t want to admit anything of the sort. Unfortunately for my anger, the thought remained.

So, with a bit more internal struggle, I told my siblings. “I think he’s actually a good dad. And, I think we should go tell him.”

They were stunned. But, with a bit of persuasion, we trekked upstairs, knocked at the door, and told him. It was sooo hard – I still wanted to be angry. But with that, the entire day changed. The angry storm of resentment yielded to blue skies and lighter spirits. And to this day, I can still feel how hard that was and how much better it felt when I was done.

I still have trouble with that level of expressing gratitude, and honestly, I don’t think it is always necessary to get those feeling out in the open. Sometimes, we just have to remember the beautiful life we have to change a tough moment.

Try this: Think of something you are grateful for. Imagine that appreciation sweeping through your mind, your life, and every cell in your body. Notice how it feels, and relish it for awhile. Now that you know what it feels like, practice until it becomes easier to feel. Then, on that tough day, in that difficult moment, bring out the gratitude…

Happy Holidays,
Ephraim

P.S. I’m back at the Examiner! You’ll see a repeat between the two sites … though we’ll see over time if variations emerge.

I stumbled on this fabulous quote from L. Frank Baum:

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

I can’t overemphasize the power of breath. A single deep breath has the power to calm your entire body - actually moves you one step closer to the parasympathetic nervous process of “rest and repose”. Traditions ranging from physical to emotional to spiritual emphasize the power of the breath in one way to change your state. I use breath in my practice to help anchor emotions in the body, to allow you to feel them more fully, to move and expand them.

So stop holding your breath.

Happy Friday,
Ephraim

Ever found yourself in a situation where you desperately wanted something far out of reach? A better body. An answer from God. Your relationship to mend. A happier life.

You want it so badly that all you can think about is having it. Everything else falls to the side – including your joy – and you live in a state of near panic, depression, anger, hope, and disappointment all the time.

But as good manifesters, we feel we must cling to the thought all the time. To keep the doubts that taint our prayers out of the mix – out of our minds. To make sure we don’t miss the answer. We curse ourselves when we forget to stay focused. And ironically, I think that clinging prevents us from actually finding the solutions we seek.  

This year, when making those resolutions, I propose another option, one much less distracting and much more open. The subtlety is in Attention vs. Intention.

Attention is conscious thought, all the time. It is the thing in the forefront of your mind, and holds the danger of distracting us from the present moment.

Intention is a moment of extreme focus – as much as you can muster – where you put your plea out to the Universe. Perhaps you do this in the morning or evening or the beginning of the year. Perhaps you write it down. Or post it on your wall. Then, let it go. Forget the specifics. Let it drift and sing on the wings of angels all day long. Let your soul decide how to best manifest your desires. Get out of your own way!

This is where Attention comes in. In the midst of surrendering to all of your possibilities, living your beautiful life, watch for the signs. Books and people and events and encounters that answer your prayers of the morning, or from last year, or that time when you were seven and wanted a pony. Anything can happen in that place of openness, and almost always it is unexpected, emerging from sources you wouldn’t possibly have considered.

In other words, stay in the present, focusing on the sheer joy of your existence. Your prayers, after all, were offered this morning. Trust that you have been heard and allow yourself to see the answer!

Then, if you want, the next morning or evening or whenever, bring yourself back to those specific Intentions. Remember and refresh them in your mind. Then offer them up again…

Questions? Feel free to comment or email.

Have a beautiful day.

Photo by Jeremy Pegg

 

If there is to be any peace, it will be through being, not having.

Henry Miller

The idea that peace is conditional, depending on certain needs being met - being loved and appreciated, financially secure, well rested, having good work - is eventually replaced by the realization that the moment you’re experiencing right now is the only one, and it can’t be changed.
- Joan Borysenko

Joy, peace, love. Everything we want and can feel can be felt right now, enjoyed right now. The present is all there is. Don’t put off your joy.

Have a delicious day,
Ephraim